Valentine Day

For the same reason a man wouldn't like it if you held a gun to his head and said, "Be romantic -- or else!" Let's face it, regardless of whether your guy happily woos you with flowers and a romantic dinner or remembers at 9:30pm and offers to share his beer, there's no escaping the emotional blackmail inherent to this "holiday."

But let's cast it in a different light. Your guy is already being as romantic as he can -- Valentine's Day merely sheds a starker beam on his current state of development. So instead of treating the day like the final exam for Romance 101, why not look at it as a chance to improve an overall upward trend in attentiveness and sensitivity? To that end, here are four suggestions.

1. Be clear with your expectations
Information is power. If you tell a man exactly what you'd like to happen on Valentine's Day, you're much more likely to get it -- and you'll save him a lot of guesswork. And a few experiences with giving you what you want greatly increase the odds of his coming up with something on his own to surprise you with.

2. Accept what he manages to come up with
Not easy, I know. But, having been clear about what you want, it is of critical importance that you let go of your expectations. Disappointment will only deter further effort, but happily, acceptance and gratitude will give him the confidence to up the ante next time. Remember: upward trend.

3. Understand that guys show love in ways that women sometimes don't appreciate
Overall, guys feel their presence in the relationship is proof of their love and don't understand why you need further evidence. Obviously, those of us less Neanderthal realize that you have a different worldview that needs to be taken into account, but there are countless ways your guy is already showing his love. This might be a good time to look for some.

4. Practice quid pro quo
Valentine's Day is a two-way street, and you know darn well what your guy wants. So why not give it to him?